Asswipe

I know the title is a bit gross, but that's what I would like to call it. So deal with it. What is Asswipe? Why Asswipe? So many questions. All your answers follow.

I was checking my mail today. Another social networking site invitation. Which one is it this time? WAYN? I am so sick and tired of these invitations. Orkut, Hi5, Facebook, Zorpia, WAYN, Friendster, Netvibe, Ryze, etc. PHEW! All of them are the same. Still we join most of them. The funniest part is that people join groups on these sites and never post on them. I am no exception, of course. I am a member of so many communities on Orkut. I used to have over a 100 at some time. Of course, now I cut them down to 23, in which I post in only 6 or 7. Some of them are there just because I want to show that it is a part of who I am, like my school communities, etc. I was a member of hundreds of music-related communities, but was active only in Pink Floyd India Fan Club, where I was a moderator. Of course, I left that community now. It totally sucks now. Anyway, that's not what this post is all about. I am just writing this post to make fun of those social networking sites. Simple as that. Still interested? Read on then.

I want to make a social networking site called Asswipe. Why Asswipe? Asswipe = Toilet Paper. And the "pages" of this site will be full of shit as well, just like all other social networking sites. Here are some of the features I would like to add.

1. There will be three lists:

a. People I hate
b. People who hate me
c. My enemies

The third list will have all the people common to the first 2 lists. If someone becomes common to the first 2 lists, he/she is automatically moved to the third one.

2. Instead of having "Pokes", we'll have "Punches".

3. Groups shall be renamed as "Gangs"

4. The Wall / Scrapbook will be replaced by "The Pot". You can send all your shit there.

5. All profile pages will be limited to 2 printable pages. If you can't explain yourself in that space, go write an autobiography.

6. You won't be allowed to add more than 50 people to your "People I hate" list. If you hate more people than that, your place is in a mental institution, not this site.

7. You can be a member of not more than 5 gangs. If you don't post in the gang for more than a month, you are thrown out of the gang.

I'll put in more features as and when I get them. :-)